Detained - Part II

The pen poised over the page, my hands now shaking so violently that I can hardly hold the pen let alone write anything I forced my hand down onto the page.    I had given up – now sobbing uncontrollably I signed the page, but with some of my wits still about me wrote in plain English below my name – (this has been signed under duress).

As my pen finished signing he pulled the page and abruptly left the room.  

I was incredibly sad; no one knew where I was.  What would mum and dad think when I just disappeared?   Would anyone ever find out, or would I just be a family mystery that future generations talked about in hushed whispers.  Or would they think I just didn’t care anymore and just vanished.   Clearly this is not what I had expected for my life - I was just starting to actually live my life and finding my confidence and feet in the world.

What seemed like an eternity later two guards came into the small interrogation room, shouting once again in Thai and with one on either side of me half dragging me out of the room…..  ”This is it I thought to myself”. 

At some point they had retrieved my backpack – everything had been pulled out and gone through with anything of value being taken, fortunately in those days I had traveler’s cheques so luckily I still had money, just not in a quickly convertible form…..thank goodness.   All of my clothes were strewn over the floor of a larger room to which I was roughly pushed into.   As they left the room, I retreated and began gathering my clothes and what was left of my belongings.   Nothing but uncertainty prevailed – what’s next I thought frantically?  My mind was racing……was I going to be taken somewhere and disposed of or were they going to do it right here in this room?

Extreme exhaustion over took me as I squatted in the corner, terrified and shaking, my breathing rough and uneven.   Everything was a blur, my head ached, my eyes were stinging.  I was filthy and grimy; my clothes reeked with the smell of fear.  (I've got to tell you it’s the most putrid smell know to man with lots of ammonia mixed into the stench of sweat and tears for good measure).    

After what felt like an eternity they returned, but to my surprise instead of putting a gun to my head and pulling the trigger one of the soldiers said in broken English that I was free to go.   Did I hear him right - I was being released?   Well, not a simple release, a better way to describe it was “man handled” out onto the street – pushed and shoved by the overzealous soldiers till I was outside the door but free non-the-less!  

Tanks on the streets of Bangkok

Literally thrown onto the busy Bangkok street, my nerves still jangling, the street was a cacophony of noise and sounds, with loads of military vehicles zooming to and fro and crowds of people hovering around the doorway to the building that I had just exited.   I guess they were waiting for word of loved ones also being detained – who knows.   


The experience had been completely overwhelming and my state of mind was not in a place where I could handle this setting too much longer. My immediate reaction was to “get the hell” out of there as quickly as I could, but was I really free or were they watching me?  I felt the paranoia rise in me which kept me very edgy, I had seen enough of what Thailand had to offer and i desperately wanted out.   Making my way back to the airport complex only to be confronted with more military and tanks and vehicles of every size and shape clogging the roads was more than enough to last me a lifetime.

The next challenge was getting out of the country…..

Without an onward ticket already booked it was going to be difficult as it looked like every westerner in Thailand also wanted to leave, so as you can imagine the airport was mayhem.   After hours of waiting in a line as longer than a football field I finally was getting close to the front of the ticket counter.  Completely conscious of my disheveled and unkempt look and trying to keep my composure or what was left of it I was finally beckoned to the wicket.

The airline agent looked at my ticket and shook her head – “you don’t have a booked flight”.   I said that I wanted to book it now; she shook her head again and said that was impossible and asked me to step aside so she could serve the next passenger.   I’m not proud to say that I completely lost it – I screamed that I wanted to book my flight now!  I told her in no uncertain terms that I did not intend to leave the line until I had a flight booked and a seat confirmed.

Can you imagine what it must have looked like, basically a street person, seemingly unbalanced wanting to get on a flight…..any flight using an unbooked ticket.   In retrospect this clearly had the potentially adverse effect of only drawing attention to me from the soldiers and security guards that were mingling ominously in the crowd but I wasn't in a sound mental state at this point….   


Fortunately for me a supervisor having been half listening to the conversation took me to one side to try and calm me down.   Thank goodness I thought.  I then went onto explain an abridged version of what had transpired over the past 24 hours and that I really needed to get out of the country as soon as possible.   He asked me to step to one side, but not to leave the area so he could see what he could do for me, so making no promises he took my ticket and began conversing with another supervisor behind the counter.   Phone calls were made and much conversation as time ticked by but within the hour he was back with news.

Little Mermaid - Copenhagen

"I can get you to Copenhagen" he announced proudly – the flight leaves at 8:00 pm.   Not exactly my plan but it would do and I thanked him profusely.   I still had some hours to kill and I couldn’t relax or rest until I was actually in my seat and airborne.  Those were some of the longest hours of my life, trying to keep a low profile and out of plain view.....yes, more paranoid behavior but who can blame me after my ordeal!

Once on my flight I slept like the dead……complete and utter exhaustion set in once I sat down in my middle seat. I pity the poor people sitting on either side of me, not that I can remember much of the flight but I must have smelt disgusting.

Next stop Copenhagen!