Being Thankful

This week my friends in the United States celebrated Thanksgiving.  Now for us Australians it’s a bit of a foreign concept given that Australia was primarily settled as a convict colony.  Clearly no one was thankful for being 10,000 from their kith and kin in the British Isles, neither the soldiers nor the convicts.   Interestingly it was until the third convict fleet that free settlers arrived on Australian shores way back in 1793, but still I’m guessing that the harsh and intimidating local environment took away much of the thanks for being there.

Being a convict transported to Australia
left little to be thankful for!

I must admit this week made me stop and wonder why we need a holiday dedicated to give thanks to all that we have.  What brought this home more than anything were the actions of a friend of mine.  My friend Ellyn has had a myriad of health problems over the past couple of years but her actions this past week made me realize that we need to say thanks each and every day and not wait for a holiday to take that emotional step back and recognize those important in our lives and give thanks for what we have. 

I was blown away by her public recognition of those close to her this past week and the group of friends that have been with her through the most difficult of times.  The times for which I speak have ebbed and flowed, but with new issues confronting her in recent times she is a true tower of strength and courage for which I know not. 

I felt completely humbled that I was included on her list of the people she thanked this week.  To be honest I feel like a bit of an interloper on that front, having only know Ellyn for a three or four months.  We speak often, and for which I hold dear, I think it’s mainly because of our ability to communicate and open up to each other thus enabling us to become firm friends.  Now don't get me wrong our conversations are not all about the negative things in our lives, quite the contrary we laugh a lot and share crazy stories as well. J

The rest of the world looks at Australia
and is thankful they don't live there...

However, it did get me thinking about being thankful but more importantly and to say it to those that I love and care about more frequently.  Since my dad died I’ve made a specific point of telling Zach and Sami that I love them everyday that I'm with them.  This has been a mantra of mine, likely because my mum or dad struggled with being able to actually say the words “I love you” to my siblings or me.  

When I sat my dad down to tell him how much he meant to me before he died, his response was “you know we're not that sort of family…” Precisely dad, precisely!

From that point on I was determined to change the soundtrack of my life so that these words became the norm and not shy away from the emotions that accompany them.  

Okay so I feel pretty good on that front, I've even extended this by saying to Glenda (my sister in Australia) now when I'm about to hang up that “I love her”, and surprisingly she’s responds by saying the same in return.   However, that’s about the extent of me pushing my family members so far, perhaps it will come, perhaps it won't...time will tell I guess.

Clearly its more difficult to tell your friends how you feel, especially as a guy.  If you say it to a female friend they may get the wrong impression and either push you away or make it weird between you, even though its friendship-love it’s a tricky one to be sure.   And damn near impossible to say to a guy friend because that would definitely make it weird…although I think this is pretty universal for heterosexual guys.

I'm truly thankful for their love

To be honest I'm not all that good at keeping connected to my friends at the best of times, and I'd even go so far as to say that I'm pretty crappy.  Yeah, I recognize that.

So the question is, how do you tell those close to you that you're thankful for their friendship and glad that they're in your life without coming off too spiritual, wacky or weird?

I guess I could publish the list on Facebook like Ellyn did – which by the way was amazing and courageous.  The more I learn about her the more I admire her “Ardito” (Italian for spunky) approach to life.

No I’m going to break ranks with many of my Australian and more importantly male counterparts and say to all of my friends, old and new alike how I feel about them. Although not quite the listing of everyone’s name (way too many to write down, but you know who you are), but without your collective caring, patience and acceptance I wouldn't be who or where I am today. 

Please know that I truly cherish your love and support even when I don't sometimes tell you and that I feel very fortunate for you being in my life - thank you!