Indelible Adventures: It got me thinking...

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I recently started a podcast series entitled “Reinvention – creating the life you want” which is available on iTunes (yes, a shameless plug!). If you’re interested in listening to this series you can find it by using “reinvention” in the key word search then scroll down to podcasts…yes, you’ll see me there. :-)

Primarily I wanted to share my journey over the past four years with all my friends, fans, followers, and readers no only the lessons I’ve gleaned but provide a no-holds barred, transparent view into my thinking, approach and, indeed all of the gory details…

My objective is to create a podcast that others can listen to and draw comfort from in that they aren’t the only ones in the world going through this process of reflection, evaluation and reinvention, because it can be an isolating and lonely journey especially when you think that you’re the only person feeling this. I personally found it difficult to talk to anyone about what I was going through emotionally, and so its nice to think that you're not an island but in fact one of the many out there who are at various points in the journey…just sayin!

I already see my podcast as successful, even in the short time I’ve been producing it the feedback I’ve had has been phenomenal. Initially I thought that if just one person stops and reflects more deeply about their lives and decides that things need to change then it will have met my expectations and help someone else. What I wasn’t expecting was the flood of comments and responses to the podcast!

Bring on the tsunami is all I can say… :-)

Writing the scripts for my podcast is little like opening a flood gate and seeing what comes out, all sorts of memories, moments and stories - the tricky part is assembling them in an order that makes sense to the listener while trying to elicit the right tone and tenor to the storyline. I now realize what an art this is and much more difficult to pull off in a meaningful way than what you might think. Personally I find it easier to be on stage and talk about my journey than tightly scripting every word.

Creating the podcast has also had its difficulties on an emotional level as I’ve had to really reopen a lot memories and moments that precipitated my reevaluation of the life I was living. Dredging up unpleasant memories is also part of the process because without this as an impetus I may not have embarked so fully on my journey and when you listen to the episodes you’ll begin to understand what I mean.

I still get emotional when I think about my father and our final six months together, what makes it more poignant is that we’re fast approaching the fifth anniversary of his death – Valentines day.

Now although Valentines Day is primarily a made up day for retailers to pedal the concept of love it’s still a day of celebrating relationships and those important to you. His passing on this day provides a different twist on love and loss that is not your traditional expectation of the day. For me its a bittersweet day...

Some might say I’m unfortunate in that my mother died the day before my birthday and so a double whammy if you will around traditionally special days. No question that they tend to anchor my emotional state at each juncture with a feeling of loss but they also tend to heighten the day and most certainly make it impossible to forget as time passes.

Reminiscing has also brought profound moments of joy, particularly as I think about the strong and vibrant relationship I've been able to develop and nurture with Zach and Sami through this process. I can’t imagine a life where I was still stuck on the corporate hamster wheel and always on the road and away from them…the sheer loneliness of that thought is so depressing and indeed now beyond comprehension. Thank goodness!

This week is a banner week for each of them as they celebrate their birthdays with Sami just turning 15 and maturing beyond her years (yes, this is very scary because at times she already acts like a 25 year old!) and I struggle to imagine what she will be like when she's 18...yikes! Clearly I mean this in a good way as she is truly a sweet, caring girl both smart and athletic - yes, the perfect blend!

Zach celebrated his 17 birthday and finding his feet as an almost adult, although for Zach he's been an adult for sometime as he's always been an "old soul" and mature beyond his years. I can’t express how proud I am of each of them as they both have developed into such unique and amazing people.

I can't express my gratitude, contentment and joy that they are such a big and important part of my life, nor can I imagine a life where they weren't.

Feeling truly blessed!

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“Hanoi Posting”

A series of fictional micro-stories by Terence Wallis

Episode 31: Unexpected

The next morning Bill was sitting in the office trying to concentrate on a story that they had been working on for submission later that day, his head throbbed incessantly from the stitches in the back of his head.

The phone jangled loudly, "Bloody hell that's loud" he thought as he picked up the receiver... "The Times - Hanoi Desk" he said, expecting his usual contact from London on the line, but there was a moment of silence before Lea greeted him "hello stranger". It took Bill a few seconds to register her unmistakeable voice. "Hello you" he said smiling broadly. It was great to hear a friendly and familiar voice, almost reassuring after what he'd been through.

After the brief catch up there was a slight pause in the conversation, Bill was feeling a little awkward when Lea broke the silence "would you like a visitor?" she said as brightly as possible given her nervousness.

Bill was clearly surprised given all that had transpired, or in actuality what hadn't transpired before he left London for his new posting in Hanoi some months before. "Of course, whenever you want" he said expectantly. Well, I might be able to book for the end of the month she said breezily, not wanting to give anything away. Is it okay if I come for two weeks, I realize I'm imposing, but I'll explore while your at work. I'll be no problem and it'll be fun!

"Okay, sure that sounds great" Bill said nervously. Let me know when you finalize your flights land I'll come pick you up. Lea sensed the slight hesitation, but put it down to the surprise phone call.

"I'll look forward to seeing you" she said before hanging up the receiver. Bill sat holding the receiver, a million thoughts rushing through his head as he reached out and slowly replaced the handset back into its cradle.

All he could do was shake his head...

Next week: Episode 32: Disbelief

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This week's selection of photos are from some recent photo shoots here in Toronto.

Enjoy!