Indelible Adventures: Starting early

Last Thursday night Zach, Sami and I were sitting around the table after dinner and the subject of learning to drive came up. Early in the New Year Zach will be turning16 and therefore able to sit for his driver’s license. I guess I knew it was coming but, where did the years go?

I still remember the day Zach was born and the nurse weighed him on the scales shortly after being delivered, with his strong and powerful crying still reverberating off the walls of the operating theatre. He looked at up at me with such curiosity, but as I spoke to him he seemed to calm down. Strangely he seemed to recognize my voice but I suppose this is rather normal especially given that I'd been speaking to him via my ex’s stomach over the course of the pregnancy, and I mean every night. I have very fond memories of being in bed together at night and me reading him stories from our newly acquired library of story books that we'd invested in - such a new parent thing to do.

He looked up at me quizzically as if he was trying to connect the visual of me and the sound of my voice, his eyes wide with wonder his face still red from his crying but with a true look of recognition at some level. The crazy part is that this memory feels like it was just yesterday, the memory etched so clearly in my mind that I shake my head every time I think of it. How on earth can he be turning 16 early in the New Year?

Indeed, I have a strong and powerful memory of Sami and her birth, but for different reasons. Hard to forget Super Bowl Sunday I suppose, yes she was born right around kick off time and although I have no idea who won, or indeed, who even played in that game but I always tell her that’s why her initials are S.B., cos’ we named her after the Super Bowl, fortunately for me she is a good sport about it even with my occasional teasing. I think we should keep her in the dark for a little longer shall we? ☺

Actually Sami's first few days were rather traumatic in that every time she tried to nurse she would projectile vomit across the room, it more closely resembled a horror movie set than a nursery. There was a real concern about dehydration and this coupled with her weight loss were not good signs... Fortunately for us she was well taken care of at Sick Kids Hospital, where they were able to stabilize her weight loss and get her feeding via a tube but I can tell you it was a very traumatic and emotional week as we watched our beautiful little girl stuck with needles and tubes while they sorted everything out, just so difficult to standby and watch. The birth of your child is already such an emotional time, but even more so when your new baby isn't thriving...

These memories are etched strongly in my mind, and I often wonder if my parents had the same feelings of love when I was born. After all our generation seems to have approached parenthood in a very different way to that of our parents. It was clearly a different era and to be fair I'm sure they were doing the best they could have given the knowledge, circumstances and social mores of the era.

Growing up the three simple words – “I love you!” were never uttered in our household, not even once. I'm sure many of you can relate to this as it wasn't something totally unusual or foreign just to me or my household but to that generation and likely the many generations before. All I can say is that the Victorian era has a lot to answer for… ☺

To illustrate this, even when dad was in his last weeks of life, and I had the conversation with him to tell him how much he meant to me and what a strong influence he had on me he was flustered when I told him that I loved him. After a short silence he cleared his throat and said with watery eyes said “you know we're not a family that says that type of thing”. Sorry but I'm changing the rules I felt like screaming. I had vowed long before that moment that I was going to make a point of telling my kids that I loved them as often as I could without being too sappy or overly sentimental, and have stayed true to that promise.

Each night they are with me the last thing I tell them before I turn off the light is that I love them, and strangely they reciprocate, which is pretty amazing for teenagers. And up until this past year, I still used to read Sami stories before bed, which I particularly loved. It’s been quite an adjustment for me to just tuck her in kiss her goodnight. Oh how I loved the years of stories and snuggles in bed, and how much I miss them now, yes I know its just the natural evolution of growing up but I still miss those moments.

I suppose that’s why I'm savoring our trips and creating new memories of our time together now in the hopes that it will help carry me through the inevitable years ahead, after all it's only going to be two more years before Zach goes to University and then the chances of the three of us spending much time together significantly diminishes.

As I mentioned in a prior blog our road trip starts this coming Thursday…via NYC, Washington DC, Raleigh, Savannah and Daytona Beach before dropping them at their grandparents place at Longboat Key (Florida). What could be more fun than a week long car journey lazily making our way down the eastern seaboard, especially as it was their suggestion.

We've already got some great ideas about each of the cities and regions that we're visiting, so next week's blog will be from the road!

Giddyup!

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As many of you who follow me on Facebook and Google + (to see more photos feel free to follow me on both) plus will already know last weekend I was in Los Angeles with my camera. This weeks selection of photos are just a handful of the more than 2000 photos I took over the course of the weekend. Enjoy!